Saturday, January 15, 2011

Don't You Worry Your Pretty Little Mind

It feels like I haven't posted in forever!  I've been sooo busy, but I've actually not been too stressed.  I've really been trying to take everything in stride and not get ahead of myself worrying.  It's HARD!! But, I think it's worth it.  It's silly that I think that if I relax a little bit, I'm going to get lazy.  Or that if I allow myself to eat something "unhealthy" I'm not going to be able to stop.  Or if I have self-confidence, that I'm going to get overconfident.  Or even, if I let someone get too close, I'll end up losing all my independance.  All of that is irrational, I know.  Arg!! Black and white thinking - it gets me everytime.

BUT, this post is not supposed to be about negative broodings.  It's about naan and tandoori chicken.  Ice skating and croquet (yes, I played croquet with an actual club and it was fun!).  A surprise dinner for a friend and volunteering at a competition.  Of course, it's about savory oatmeal with cheese and sweet cocoa krispie treats.  Because, quite frankly, my life has been wonderful, lately!  God has given me so much and I sometimes feel guilty, but why shouldn't I deserve to be happy?  I know I sin, but I'm only human and I know that I am loved (by Him and by my family) no matter what.

Sorry I have no pictures!  I really wish I could post more, but I don't have a personal camera and phone pics are not very pleasing lol.  Someday! Although I was thinking about posting one of the pictures of myself from the Christmas show, but I'm not sure.  It's a good picture, but I'm kind of nervous about it, idk why, lol.  We'll see...

Anyway, I've been trying to read and comment as much as I can.  I love reading all your blogs because I can relate to all of them whether they're recovery blogs or food blogs or just life blogs.  :) Love you guys!  Have a good weekend everyone!

<3

4 comments:

  1. I'm glad to hear you've been doing well - but you're right, don't worry your pretty little mind! There is no reason to feel guilty or worried, because yes, you do deserve to be happy and surrounded by wonderful people and enjoy good times. And to be stress free while still remaining busy is a wonderful thing.
    I can understand how being a black-and-white thinker is, though. It's a good trait to have sometimes, but a pain in the butt other times :P Don't worry - with time, that will start to phase out :)

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  2. I'm glad that you're trying to let yourself relax - you deserve it. It's good for you too.

    The ED is all about extremes - black and white thinking. A huge part of recovery for me has been about learning to find the middle ground that's in there somewhere.

    I love naan...haha. It is so good to hear that life has been wonderful lately.

    Stay strong!

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  3. Hi, I'm a new follower and I'm really happy to have found your blog.

    I struggle with black and white thinking A LOT, and I have to keep reminding myself about all the shades of gray in between.

    Your post is so wonderfully positive it brought a smile to my face. I'm looking forward to reading more!

    Take care!

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  4. I know EXACTLY what you mean about the black and white thinking.. but in my case, sometimes that IS the case. I'm either cocky or self-loathing. I eat nothing or I gorge. I am a social butterfly or a hermit. Why is this so? I think it's because I FORCE myself to be this way. Does that make sense? Idk.. Anyway, you seem to be doing well! I'm glad you're so happy :)
    Just keep in mind that eating is just that. Eating. Nothing more. It shouldn't define us. Our lives. Our happiness. You're so much more!
    Keep up the positive attitude :)
    <3 Haley

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